The World’s Worst City

I haven't traveled all over the world, but I've travelled a little bit. I've been all over North America, I've been in South America, I've been in Africa, and I've been in Europe. This doesn't make me an expert, but it qualifies me to pick a clear winner in my "worst cities" list: Las Vegas.

Here are ten reasons why I think Las Vegas is the worst city in the world.

1. Lack of Faith: As many prayers as are offered daily in this city ("Please, God, give me a seven and I swear I'll follow you for all my days"), it's a city remarkably devoid of God. I'm leaving after a 4-day trip here, having never seen a single church.
   
2. It's a city that appeals to nothing so much as it appeals to our own greed. Though an appeal to lust is a close second.
   
3. Cigarette smoke: Everywhere, anywhere, all the time. It's the lung cancer poster child city.
   
4. No one is real. If they are they hide it.
   
5. Nothing is real: I discovered here a near-perfect plastic spoon that was designed to look like a silver one; the dome of the mall in the Venetian is painted to look like the sky, with blue and fluffy clouds; and you can see on the boats poled by the fake gondoliers, if you look closely under their stern, small electric propellers that push them along.
   
6. Everybody wants something. Nobody wants to give anything.
   
7. It's a city devoted completely to the pursuit of incredible excess wealth – "the bread of today" is not an option.
   
8. Everyone seems desperate and sad.
   
9. Even the happy people seem angry.
   
10. Millions of foreigners come here thinking it represents the quintessential America. (Maybe it does, but I prefer to think not.)
    

As long as I'm in technology I'm going to have to keep coming here for events because it's a great trade show city – distractions, easy money, noise and smoke and lights. But I expect it will always make me sad.

I want to go home, where it's not so hard to find a quiet place to pray, where the songs come freely and easily to my mind, and where my family waits in all their dysfunctional glory.

My plane leaves in 2 more hours. J